Friday, July 15, 2011

Rambling thoughts at midnight about me and cancer...

It's a little after midnight and I'm wide awake....thinking.
What do you say when people ask, "How are you?"
Do they mean, "how is my life going?"   or "how am I feeling?"  or maybe even, "how is my spiritual life?"

I started this blog mostly because my family wanted to know how I am doing...maybe in all of the ways  above.

A year or two ago, I was interested in reading a book by a man who knew he was dying.  I wanted to see if he practiced what he preached to the end...and he did. (He had a marvelous faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, and loved the Word!)  I gave the book away to a man whose family felt he was going to die soon, and it was before I knew this breast cancer had come back in my spine. (I wish I had kept it--I think that man is going to outlive me!)   I know we all live in a dying world, and so unless the Lord comes first, we will all be at death's door one day. 

Besides being an outlet for my emotional outbursts (have I published one of those yet?), this blog for me, was to show others who might be facing cancer in their lives, or things that they can't control, that God really is there in our deepest hour of trial..  So far, He has done above giving me peace, and also I know He is there for me for the future.  He heals me, too, so I wonder if this blog is even something I should continue to do!   The unexpected journey could include joyous affirmation of His care for me (which really is NOT unexpected!) so, whether in healing physically this body of mine, or giving me grace for unexpected trials yet to come, I will rest in Him.  I love Romans 8! 

I am so blessed by love shown to me by many friends, brothers and sisters in our Lord Jesus Christ, and by my family.  Above even that, I have a husband, who at 90 years of age, still provides and cares for his "young" wife, and loves her!   (Sometime I'll have to write about how God definitely led us to marry, even though he was 20 years my senior, and shorter than this tall one here!)

Well, I'll quit rambling, and see if  I can put into practice a verse I often quote to myself when laying down at night.   It is from Psalm 4 and says, "I will both lay me down, and sleep, for Thou Lord only makest me to dwell in safety"  (I learned it in the King James Version).


  1. Oh, I pray that you will lay down and sleep in peace tonight. And that your heart and mind will stay in safe places: free from worry and fear. May God wake you full of the glory of his presence.
    And...then maybe you can bless us with the love story of you and your husband.

  2. What an encouraging post. As long as I can remember our family talked about how my grandmother was 19 when she married my grandfather who was 39. He already had 5 children. His wife had died. I think back in those days it was unusual for someone to marry someone 20 years their senior. I think now it is not that unusual.
    Blessings to you and your dear hubby.

  3. Thank you for sharing this. I will pray for healing. And, I would love to hear the story about you and your husband!

  4. You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? ~Psalm 56:8

    I would also love to hear about you and your husband. :) What a powerful post of being raw and real. Thank you for sharing your heart!

  5. Lifting you up in prayer right now! God bless you and fill you with His peace.

  6. Great post. Many will be blessed because you share what is happening in your life and the way you are responding to it. I too love Romans 8. Verse 28 is my favorite. Thank you for starting this blog and for writing today's post.

  7. Praying for peace, sleep and healing. Thank you for sharing this and the hope and courage it will give others.

  8. I, too, memorized it in the King James and quote it quite often. The night hours are the longest when our cares of life overwhelm us. I've fallen asleep many nights quoting it over and over.

    I'd love hearing your love story!

    In Him,